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| 27 august; teambuilding is good for the soul |
[August the 27th] |
[Albion/Order].
I for one love a good sunrise in the Scottish lochs.
Thank you, Moody.
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| 23 august; in my place |
[August the 23rd] |
[Warded to Rabastan, Bellatrix, Aeneas, Corbina. Readable by Pepper, Aloysius and Rufus.]
Since you beasts enjoy spreading lies as much as you like incest, I suppose that I shall enlighten you with some fucking facts about what I know concerning Rodolphus Lestrange's last days.
I WAS THERE. You didn't get all of us. I beat him with my fucking fists, I beat him with my favourite pair of brass knuckles, I nearly drowned him and for all your Pureblooded self-righteousness, not one of you could do anything about it.
You are going to back the good people into a corner and when they realise that they still have a modicum of power, I FEAR for you because they will do what they have to do to protect their lives.
Your fucking blood won't make a lick of difference. The people will rise up. You should have learned from history: you have power for a while, but as you continue to abuse it, as you continue to cow people with FEAR, you will die. You will all die. AND I CAN'T WAIT FOR THE DAY.
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| 10 august; i've got my feet on the ground and i don't go to sleep to dream |
[August the 10th] |
[Private]
I am so fucking stupid. Rodolphus gone, Bellatrix raving, the death of a newborn baby ... of brand new parents ... and I am thinking about having children with Pepper. Of course he wouldn't want to have children with me. I'm the one who got so emotionally fucked up with Rodolphus Lestrange. I'm the one who ended up in the Rehabilitation Centre. He wouldn't want his children sharing my genes.
Call me crazy but thinking slightly ahead - looking on to when I don't have to worry about torture and knives and scars and death ... that gives me hope. Like if I can envision a post-war life in which I'm still living, breathing, functioning human-being, then maybe it will actually happen. And at that time I will have to tell Pepper that he doesn't have to keep staying with me out of pity. He can go be with Croaky and Aubrey. I'll go to Bangkok to get my family and then we'll disappear back into Nantes somewhere.
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| 3 august; a candle for you |
[August the 3rd] |
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Just to open up the conversation I was having with my husband (and because my own knowledge of Hogwarts Houses is limited): Is Bellatrix Lestrange a Hufflepuff?
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| 31 july; i love your long shadows |
[July the 31st] |
[Private]
There is a part of me that wants to know everything - every word, every look, every gesture - that passed between Rodolphus and Frank. This is the part of me that is jealous that it was not I that killed him, almost in mourning that he is gone, my foe and yet ...
I have the space to write it. I have the privacy of my own thoughts. There were moments ... whole spans of time, even, that I was so taken with him (was he thus taken with me?) - that I would have done anything to stay in his presence, to continue to fight with him. I thought we would be at it perpetually. I did not think he would be the first to go.
I don't have anything to remember him by
After the near fire - after the Rehabilitation Centre - it was then that the infatuation (yes, even the love) I held for him died. When I found out he killed Marlene - when I found out how - it only served to place the final nail in the coffin. My sympathy, my desire ... was gone. He had wrung it out of me, slow and sure as his own belief in what he was doing was right.
Do you still think you are right, Rodolphus? Are you still as arrogant as ever you were? Or, beyond the veil of flesh, do you perceive the joke? The big, ridiculous prank that life plays on all of us ... that in the gutter, in the belly of the beast, we are all just the same old evolutionary beings fighting for survival.
I don't know if that's a lesson for you, I don't know if you can even learn it now. And I sure as hell don't know if wizards have souls - my mama says we all do - but I should hope that if you do, there's some serious self-reflection going on. Nobody's right, darling. We're all just trying to keep on living one more day, one more hour, one last breath.
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| 30 july; you were holding my heart in your little hands |
[July the 30th] |
[Sirius and Remus]
All quiet on the Western front? You boys are leaving me hanging.
[Pepper]
Just so you know: I smashed the fuck out of Rodolphus Lestrange's face with a pair of brass knuckles. AND THEN I used the knife you got me to stab him. Frank's got him. This is all very JUST YOU AND ME ... nobody else. I do not want to endanger Frank at all. But I have to tell you, I've never seen the monster looking that weak ... I think Frank will actually do it.
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| 27 july; what you may divine |
[July the 27th] |
It has recently come to pass that I have also forgotten my birthday. A symptom, I am sure, of getting brainfucked by the Rehabilitation Centre.
So here's a list of what I want:
Rodolphus Lestrange with his head on a pike brought to justice
Gaius Travers's own designs turned back upon him
Amycus Carrow's throat cut for being a traitor
All Death Eaters imprisoned
The right government restored to order
That is NOT a tall order. I think I should get everything on my list!
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